I know what you’re thinking, “Oh no. Please don’t let this be another article about some wacked out way that you’re going to try to convince me that the world is going to come to an end”.  Well, you’re in luck, because it’s nothing like that at all. Actually, it’s quite the opposite. Of course you’ve noticed how some people seem to get themselves all worked up over “impending disasters” that will probably never happen in our life time.  Alternative theories, let’s call them, that probably won’t show up until mankind has vanished from the face of the earth, completely.

By now, I’m sure you’re wondering where I’m going with this. What exactly am I driving at?  No, I’m not talking about Zombies.  Although there has always been the worry/threat of biological warfare, that’s not the topic of this specific discussion.  What I’m talking about, to put them simply, are theories such as the Mayan calendar, pole-shift, solar flares, gigantic asteroids, and the like.

Regardless of what your belief is, chances are that there will come a day…whether sooner or in the far, FAR distant future…when the human race will cease to exist on this big, round, blue ball we call home. What will happen to us? Where will we be? Well, that all depends on your own individual belief.

So, anyway, back to the topic at hand. One morning last week, when I finally rolled myself out of bed, a question came to mind, “Why are people so worked up over these kinds of circumstances? What is it, really, about these could-be/would-be tragedies, that’s got so many of our fellow preppers, who believe that’s how it’s all going to end, in such a frenzy?” So, as I sipped my wonderfully creamy coffee, I set forth to research, dig in deep, and find out for myself if any of these concerns actually ‘hold water’.

After spending, what seemed to be an almost-eternity, at my computer, reading countless articles, written by accredited sites and “Joe-Shmo-Sheepelton”, this is my own opinion on the aforementioned alternative theories.

We’ll start with the most popular of topics, the Mayas. An advanced civilization of their time, they hailed from Mexico’s Yucatan Peninsula. Ok, I shouldn’t have to get into who they were and where they came from…we’ve all heard this theory before, right? If you haven’t, where have you been…under a rock?! The theory is that the world, as we know it, will come to an end on December 21, 2012, simply because that’s when the Mayan calendar ends. Well, let’s look at some facts, shall we.

The Mayan people had many different calendars, each with its own specific purpose, from crop cultivation to the cycles of the sun, and so on. However, the calendar that is the heat of so much debate is known as the “Long Count”. This calendar calculates a period of time that author Frank Waters referred to in his book “Mexico Mystique” as “The Great Cycle”. Some experts have put this calendar together with the Gregorian calendar (also known as the Western calendar…the calendar we currently use today) and came up with the conclusion that it started August 11, 3114 B.C. and will end on the winter solstice, December 21, 2012, at which time the Sun will align with the center of the Milky Way…or something like that. Some also speculate that this alignment will cause our poles to shift (red rover, red rover, let pole shift come over) and cause all kinds of mass destruction and doom. However, if you take the time to dig deep enough, you will find that there is really no underlying drama with this calendar at all. 

Let me see if I can explain the Maya’s cycles of time a little more to you. There are 360 days in a Mayan year, also called a katun. There are 20 katuns in a baktun and 20 baktuns in a pictun…see the pattern?  A baktun, is 144,000 days or, a little more than 394 years. The end of the Long Count marks the end of Baktun 13. While there are some ancient texts that say that the end of 13 baktuns is sort of a reset point, other texts simply say that the calendar keeps on rolling. Truth is, no one paid much (if any) attention to the end of the Maya’s Long Count calendar until 1975, when 2 different books came out about the subject, one more so than the other. A lot of facts and interpretations of ancient Mayan texts were twisted and the calendar was grossly miscalculated and overestimated.

Long story short, there is no real Mayan tradition behind the end of the world. Moreover, at the end of each calendar, all they did was celebrate the end of a cycle, and then make a new calendar. They could not have known when the end of the world was going to happen. It’s just simply not logical.  They were just living their lives, day to day, as any civilization does or ever has. As for the solstice, all it is, is when the earth is at its greatest distance from the sun…hence the colder temperatures. The whole thing about the sun aligning with our galactic center, well, according to NASA, it’s a narrow chance, to say the least, that the winter-solstice sun will ever eclipse the galaxy’s true center. In fact, the winter-solstice sun won’t even pass by it for another 200 years, give or take, and even then, it won’t be close enough to cause any damage at all. Needless to say, my personal belief is that this theory is totally bunk.

Ok. Moving on……..

Geological Magnetic Polar Reversal, a.k.a Pole Shift. C’mon, was there any doubt that this is where I was going next? I have read so much on this subject alone, mostly because of its hysterical entertainment value. I had no idea when I started this research, that there are actually people in this world that believe the crazy and most illogical shit-storm of irrationalness that goes along with this alternative theory. There are actually many websites on this subject, and how to survive a pole shift…forums mostly, of like-minded people, and I have to ask, why are they allowed to walk among us, deemed as normal (non-psychotic) individuals, because let me tell you, this is a doozy! Stay with me on this one. 

Ok. So, some people believe that on or around December 21, 2012 (damn you Mayas!), when the sun aligns with our galactic center, that it will cause our magnetic poles to reverse, causing mass chaos and destruction, and also cause our civilization to return to the primitive “cave-man” days. And then there are others that believe that when the poles do shift, that the lucky few that believed with all their hearts, will…wait for it…somehow be spiritually orientated and be able to communicate with aliens from other worlds. … Seriously? You can’t possibly expect me to take that in as actual fact!! But, I digress. … Here, I’m sure you need a good laugh today. So, I’ll give you a REALLY good example of what I’m talking about as far as ‘primitive days to come’. This is an excerpt from a site that shall remain nameless:


            “Our purpose for this site has to do with a wish that civilization on this planet not fall way back in time to the near the cave man days. We realize it will fall back in living conditions but we wish for it to not to fall too far back. It is our hope that by providing this information of  mostly 'how to' technology that mankind will not fall back as far as it would have if this information had not been collected and freely provided. It is our wish that mankind on this planet not stay in the primitive state that will be imposed by this event as has happened in previous pole shifts. It is our hope that the information provided will be appropriate for the primitive long term survival and the eventual building of a new civilization that we see as possible for the future.”

See what I mean? Ludicrous!! And keep in mind that this was absolutely, 100% copied and pasted directly from their site. Maybe, just maybe, if they had taken the time to actually proof-read their ‘mission statement’, maybe they wouldn’t have sounded so insane. Wait, no…still bat-shit-nuts. The site goes on to say a lot of other just asinine stuff, but the one thing that stuck out to me like a sore thumb, was “…as has happened in previous pole shifts.” I had to find out when the last time this happened was, and how the creators of this website know for sure that the planet stayed in a “primitive state”. According to NASA (Oooo…big, scary, always has a conspiracy NASA!!) the last complete pole shift happened about 780,000 years ago. So, logic dictates that yeah, things were pretty dang primitive way back then. There’s absolutely NO evidence that anyone has ever found a hidden New York City, for instance, buried deep beneath the earth, in some archeological dig, thus proving that the poles shifted and the world was ‘reset’…or whatever. Ancient civilizations have been found, yes, but not from THAT long ago!

Yeah, so, facts check time.  The earth’s polarity is NOT constant. It’s always moving. There have been somewhere in the ballpark of a couple to a few hundred pole shifts in the last 3 billion years. How do they know? Well, it’s because of sediment cores taken from the depths of the Mid-Atlantic Rift (where the North American and European continental plates are spreading apart). With these cores, scientist have made a direct link between the magnetic field and the fossil record, which shows no evidence of drastic changes in either plant life, animal life, or glacial activity. There is also further proof that a pole reversal would not even affect the rotation of the earth’s axis. Reversals are something that happens all the time, but only very slowly and gradually over millennia. For example, the poles only move about 10-40 miles per year, and there is no evidence that one has ever happened in a clean and dramatic flip.

There is one other doomsday theory on this same subject that others believe, that’s not as crazy, which is that once the poles shift that we will succumb to solar flares (hello, next topic, come on in and have a seat) because the earth’s fields would be momentarily weakened. Well, although the earth’s magnetic field can weaken and strengthen over time, it simply will not disappear completely. A weaker field would obviously give us a small increase of solar radiation, but definitely nothing deadly, because we have something called an atmosphere, that helps protect us from the suns particles. Moreover, there is nothing in all the years of scientific research that suggests that a pole shift should be looked at as a doomsday catastrophe. So, again…this bucket of nonsense has holes all through it.

Part 2 of this article will cover the stupidity of Solar Flares and Gigantic Asteroids hurtling toward the earth to kill us all……or something to that effect. ;-)